Why Criticism Hurts and What to Do About It

Everything is easier with a plan. When you have a plan for how you will deal with criticism, you’ll be more likely to let it roll off your back when it doesn’t benefit you or take advantage of the advice when it’s truly helpful. Plus, an effective plan will help you tell the difference!

Follow this process when you’re faced with criticism:

1. To decide what kind of criticism you’re dealing with, ask yourself the following questions:
   • What is the source of this criticism? Do they know what they’re talking about?
   • What is their intention? Are they truly trying to help me or to hurt me? What do they get out of giving me this criticism?
2. Choose how you want to proceed:
   • If the source of the criticism isn’t an expert, avoid giving it any of your attention. The same is true if the person has negative intentions. Just get back to work.
   • If the criticism is intended to be helpful and comes from someone knowledgeable, proceed with the next item on this list.
3. Listen intently. The criticism you’re receiving could be incredibly valuable.
4. Ask questions. Ensure you fully understand.
5. Thank the other person. Be appreciative of their efforts.
6. Process what you heard. How can you use the information? Make a plan and apply it.
7. Return for more feedback. After you’ve applied your new plan, ask for more advice on how to proceed further. Repeat the process.

Feel free to use your own knowledge and experience to modify this process, but ensure you have a plan to get the most benefits from the good advice you receive.